Squirrel Syndrome

Most people know Squirrel Syndrome (which I’m going to call SS for the rest of this blog) from the movie Up! Where the dog gets distracted by a squirrel in mid sentence, but this is a real thing, it happens to pretty much everyone. You’re watching a show and get distracted by something that you should have done, or your’re at the grocery store and on your way to the onions you notice watermelon and grab that, just to completely forget the onion.

Normal, right?

But, what if you are walking home from the bus and suddenly remember something you could do when you get home, run across the street without looking, and almost get hit by a car?

Not so normal right?

For most of us looking both ways is second nature, but for an ADHD kid, it’s not so much. Their little brains are going a mile a minute, constantly thinking, wondering or day dreaming and then forget common sense.

For parents SS is super frustrating, I mean, try using a time out chair when literally 10 seconds after you place them there they forget why they’re there, and the Supernanny process is to not speak, just continue to place them back on the chair. If you’re an ADHD mom you know that this tactic typically doesn’t work. Like, what’s the point of putting them back there, if when they get off the chair after hours of putting them back on or after trying to hold them in the chair if they’re just going to forget.

Here’s a story, one time Tyler was in time out (no clue what he was there for now) I had put him back on that damn chair 100 times, no joke. I was tired, I was a single mom, I just didn’t have it in me to keep putting him back on that chair. Curse the chair! Burn it! I didn’t want any more part of that chair.

Anyway, I decide to hold him in it, no way he’s getting up now, right?

WRONG!

While holding him down and him getting frustrated with me because I was restraining him, and things beginning to escalate to hyper meltdown status, my glasses slid down on my nose a little, prompting the little shit to stop mid meltdown, completely calm down, no more tears, no more fighting me, no more screaming.

He pushes my glasses back up my nose!!!!(squirrel)

I had a million emotions run through me all at the same time (which as an ADHD parent you’ll know happens way more than we’d like) I was mad, furious even (cause that’s all it took for the tantrum to end), I was happy (because the tantrum time out was over), I laughed (because if you could have seen the look on his face as he slowly pushed the glasses back up all while keeping a straight face and eye contact), and surprised (because the dude gave me eye contact!!)

Speaking of eye contact (SQUIRREL!) 

Have you ever tried the parenting method where you get down to their level and put one hand on their shoulder for contact to keep their attention to have an important conversation?

I have too, over and over and over again. With little eyes flicking back and forth like a pendulum. I had to resort to making him repeat what I’ve said to ensure he has heard me, because even with the touch his brain is so busy that he just can’t focus on our conversation.

Discipline is hard, it’s even harder with an ADHD kid. What works for most kids just doesn’t work here. SS is real and it’s frustrating for parents, so if you have any tips on how to discipline though the wrath of squirrel syndrome please feel free to leave a comment.

The Journey Begins

https://www.instagram.com/p/BYEbAJ4g9Al/?taken-by=lastories&fbclid=IwAR2YWI75kxctrWr3jhyBDK0VNHboapQJ5gyLkfM2hG4mxAqssuVf4Fax4rs

“People who annoy people are the luckiest people in the world” – Howie Mandel

If that’s the case Howie, than my boy is the luckiest around.

I always knew he was special, right from his first steps. My busy little one year old was into everything, we had to remove it all from the waist down, simply telling him “no” did not suffice.

As time passed it became more apparent that this little nugget just wasn’t “normal”. From when time outs just didn’t cut it, to his complete melt down because his finger was “infected with pink” (his words, not mine) because he got into pink nail polish, to our most recent meltdown of expecting white rice but getting broccoli rice and he couldn’t put ketchup on it (again, his thought process, I don’t care how he grosses up food, just as long as he eats it)

In April, 2018 Tyler was diagnosed with ADHD. Now, to some this would have been devastating, but to me, not so much. This was a relief, finally after years of knowing something just wasn’t right, I had confirmation. There is a whole back story here that I will share in time, but for right now I want to tell you what I’m doing writing a blog.

After a routine catch up with my Aunt we had talked about how I’d like to advocate for parents of kids with ADHD. How when Tyler was diagnosed we were given a prescription and sent on our way like deer in headlights. All I could think was, so, what do we do now? Where’s the manual?  How do we get this to be a manageable mental illness? Who’s supposed to help me? Give me all the books. Give me all the support groups. Give me all the help.

That’s when I realized that the support groups were just people asking if anyone has a child doing this or that and people commenting yes or no, but no one really sending us in a direction to correct those behaviors. Most everyone is stressed out and “dealing” with their kids, but that’s not what I was looking for. I was looking for somewhere to not only know that I’m not alone, but to give other parents the resources that I’ve found helpful and stories (cause we all know there’s a lot of them) of the fun times, the accomplishments, the failures and the funnies. A place where I didn’t learn to “deal” with my child, but where I could learn to live and enjoy my child, because when a child feels like they are being “dealt” with it is more than likely going to make them feel unworthy, and no one ever wants to feel that way.

I found tons of parenting blogs, but none that are specific to parents getting real about ADHD. So, here you are, a blog about a mom who is about to get personal and share the realness of parenting a child with ADHD.

Picture credit: https://www.instagram.com/p/BYEbAJ4g9Al/?taken-by=lastories&fbclid=IwAR2d4G5dc5YZCMybMJZKBJJUsN9EaRnGg5oh4l8YwTmsx2c-y9XVYTKYD5M